April 16 - Thursday

Its been a long time since I've handled this deck. It was nice to find the time again.

I asked:
What do I need to know about tomorrow?
1. The Day
2. The Challenge
3. Advice

1. King of Chalices
The king sits on his throne, alone, floating on the sea. Very emotional day coming. I will feel overwhelmed and isolated.

2. 7 of Chalices

Perhaps I will be distracted - dreaming about my options. My choice has been made, but I have not acted on it yet.

3. 2 of Swords

So hard to read this card sometimes. Does it show what I should do? or the folly in not acting?

I am at a standstill and have been. Does this card advise me to keep the balance? Or tell me to take off the blindfold, stand up and put one sword down?

I keep asking - when? when? when?
So far they aren't saying NOW!

April 9 - Thursday

Just a few questions as I turned over cards:

What do I need to know most?

3 of Pentacles (Reversed)
Things will be getting difficult for me at work. I am feeling it already.

What is the obstacle?

Justice (Reversed)
I am feeling awful about not telling anyone that I am leaving yet. I sit there and we discuss things we plan to do in a few months time, yet I say nothing. I may not be there when they happen. I am Injustice. She deserves to know, yet I am silent.

What can I do about it?

The Tower
This is what I expect when I do come forward with my truths, and give notice.
When I turned this card over, I actually laughed. My brain said "Ride the Lightning!"

Keep feeling they are telling me, do what ya gotta do. Get on with it.

I'm almost there. I just need to hear back about the budget - need to know when they can start me full time. Will it be weeks or months?

How will I be after the changes?

Queen of Pentacles
I will be stable, secure and able to provide for my family.

This makes me feel better. I just have to get past the ugliness.

Having a rough time of it. Working six days a week is slowing killing me. Not sure how long I can hold out. Not doing a full spread today - not enough time or mental capacity. Just asked a few questions. Just to keep to my schedule, sort of. Though my Wednesdays will be more difficult, as I am working that day now.

1. Why is it so hard to do? (quitting my job)


Strength
Sometimes things take courage. Not all worthwhile tasks are easy ones. I just need to "buck up" and do what needs to be done.

2. Will I be able to carry the load?(Working the two jobs - 6 day work weeks, til the new job can take me full time)

The Devil
I take that as a no. I see myself chained in this situation, and those chains are dragging me down. This past week - moving into week 2 now - has been hell.

3. How long will/can I hold out?


9 of Wands
I asked the question, but never really worked with timing in readings, so any help on this would be awesome. 9 days? 9 weeks? til the 9th of April?

4. Totally unrelated question: Should I consider moving, for my son's sake?

2 of Wands
I need to think long and hard before seriously considering this.

April 1 - Wednesday

Crossing the River Spread

Someone used this recently, I think. Thought I'd give it a go.

1. Start - where you are now in the situation
2. End - where you wish to be
3. River - what obstacles are in the way.
4. Bridge - how to overcome these obstacles

1. 6 of Wands
Not sure I get this. I am feeling triumphant, successful. The lwb speaks of being successful in dreams, but I don't get the dream part in this. But I suppose it could fit. I am feeling wanted by both employers and thats a good feeling.


2. The Tower
I want this move, which will be a big change over where I've been for the last 2+ years.


3. 9 of Chalices
I'm set in my ways. I've been content in my present job and have a hard time taking the necessary steps to shake up my little status quo. Change is hard. Its nice just sitting here on my little stool. Comfortable.


4. Queen of Pentacles
If I am to overcome my inertia, I will need to be practical and pragmatic. I am the supporter of my household. I need to to what needs to be done to ensure my family is safe and well cared for.

I saw her as a real wake up call, here. Kind of what are you hemming and hawing about? You have work that needs to be done. I must PROVIDE, and I know in my heart what the best opportunity for me is. It should not be so hard.

3/29/09 - Sunday

Couldn't quite get on here to post before now. On Sunday I went through almost the whole deck - telling the story of myself, as I went through the cards. It was quite fun and enjoyable.

(High Priestess)Once upon a time there was a girl who wanted very much to learn about the mysteries. (Judgement) She was reborn after (6 Pentacles) learning to give and (2 Wands) searching within.

(Kind of Chalices) She met a good and sensitive man (The World) who gave her the world(marriage, happy home, child). (9 Pentacles) They were happy and content together. (8 Chalices) but something was missing.

(King of Swords) She couldn't stop thinking about it. If she could figure out what that missing piece was, (4 Wands) there would be much rejoicing and celebration. (3 Swords) But she feared heartbreak, (4 Swords) so she retreated to rest and ponder.

(7 Chalices) She wanted many things. (Death) She was too materialistic, (2 Chalices) but she knew the value of the love and partnership she'd found.

(The Chariot) They moved (The Sun) to sunny Arizona. LOL!
(The Moon) They were on guard, for this was a strange new world for them.
(The Wheel) This new life held many challenges for them.

(Queen of Swords) She worried constantly. (4 Chalices) Did she make the wrong choice? Was the dream all an illusion? (The Hierophant) She had to learn the rules of life out there. (King of Wands) She had to use her energies wisely. (Queen of Chalices) So she listened to her heart, (5 Chalices) though she often thought of the life she'd left behind.

(Temperance) She knew she must find balance - keeping part of the old life, blending it with the new. or (8 Swords) let go of the memories that bound her, and kept her from living in the now. (3 Wands) She sought a new beginning...

(Queen of Pentacles) She met a woman, financially stable and practical. (Queen of Wands) A woman who knew how to enjoy life. (6 Wands) She had exciting ideas. (Knave of Chalices) She understood.

(3 Chalices) They became friends and enjoyed working together. (Knight of Swords) She started to have new ideas of her own. (Ace Pentacles) A new job opportunity was offered.

(9 Chalices) She had been content in her old position. (6 Chalices) but it wasn't perfect. There was conflict.

(The Stars) She felt the new position would be much more fulfilling and rewarding. (Knight of Pentacles) This would be a profitable move for her. (The Emperor) She felt intimidated by her employer. She felt controlled and powerless.

(7 Wands) She had to fight those ideas. (Magician) She had to take responsibility, have the self confidence to act, (Death) or accept that she will lose herself and this opportunity. (Strength) She needed the courage to act despite her hesitation and desire to avoid conflict.

(Ace Pentacles) The new job (Knave of Swords) would require her full concentration and (Knave of Chalices) to know her feelings. (Ace of Swords) She was strengthened by the pride she felt. Knowing she was wanted, (2 Swords) though she still struggled with how to act on her decision.

(5 Wands) She longed to be part of the team and (6 Swords) knew the move was coming.....

And thats where I had to stop. Funny that the day intruded right about where I am now. I wanted to see how it would end!

Overall a fun excercise. Might do it again, t some extent, though its a big commitment to run the whole deck that way.

March 27

I've been thinking alot - again - about the choice that I will need to make about work. Do I stay with my dr. at my current job, or do I go manage the new spay/neuter clinic?

I like my job and get along with my boss. I have a lot of responsibilities there, which is both good and bad. Financially things haven't been going well there, which is what led me to the opportunity to work more with the local animal rescue group.

I've been working with them twice a month for spay neuter for a couple years now and would love to be able to do more. And they want me for their clinic. They suspect they may be ready to open in July, but there is lots of work to be done.

Tonight I started asking questions and just flipping cards. Not a formal layout, but this is what I got:

1. What do I need to know? (about making a decision/choosing)

7 of Chalices

I can't have both jobs. I need to make a choice. This being cups, I need to go with my feelings on this.

2. But How can I do this?

8 of Swords(Reversed)

I cannot continue to be bound by my own thoughts. My hands are NOT tied. I AM free to choose. I just need to have the guts to MOVE. To just do what I have to do.

3.What will happen when I do decide?

3 of Wands

Once I make the choice, I can be free. My mind can finally be open enough to see what lies ahead in this new world of my choosing.

Its just the actual act - of letting my boss know whats coming thats so hard. I am such a chicken!

March 25 - Wednesday

As, my plan is to read on my days off, I grabbed my deck first thing when I got up. Had lots of fun last night at Aeclectic. Finally joined in on the "Use Your Powers For Good Thread". Trying to figure out what someone - rhombchick - has hidden and where. Think I was too sleepy to nail it, but she said I was kinda close with some of the things I'd seen. Good enough for me,for a first attempt. I'll be back for another try later.

So, for today's reading, I asked: What do I need to do, to best help my son?

10 of Pentacles - Reversed; 2 of Wands; 2 of Chalices (no positions)

I need to focus more on him - less on material things. Stop being such a spendy person because him and his needs are more important. I see the lady-fox as me - not even looking at him - and I can almost hear him, saying "bored! bored! bored!" as he often does.

I need to think hard - as Froggie here is doing. Base my decisions on logic and not emotions.

Was seeing this card last night! :P
This is something that D and I must work on together. This isn't just for me to decide. Love with get us thru. And still the caduceus stands out at me. We need to find the best medicine for him - but the lion looks like a heart.
Love is the best medicine?...

Anything else jump out at you? Something obvious I am missing?

March 22 - Card of the Day

4 of Wands

What I see:
Large house, well maintained. 4 wands as pillars - decorated with greenery. The frogs are dancing.

Its a celebration!

So, today is a relaxing day, to enjoy with my family.
(didn't feel like housework anyway.) :P

Unless, I can relax and celebrate once my house is in order - and well maintained.
:)

The Tarot of the Magical Forest

I am committed to exploring this deck and getting in tune with it. It thus far reads well, if only I trust my intuition.

I "think" I know the standard RW meanings enough to read this deck intuitively, but I have been away long enough that I don't trust what I see.

Practice, reading and time, I'm sure, will go a long way to chipping away my self-doubt. I haven't read for anyone in over 20 years, so part of my doubt may stem from the whole - maybe I've just been kidding myself type doubts.

Not sure that made any sense. Never blogged before either. :P

Anywho, weekly readings at the least. Several times a week is more my goal.

Let the games begin!